Our own pilgrimage
by Alexiamorana
Summary: PreFFX. A fallen warrior and his servant flee from the temples, seeking a free life. Auron/OC M for sexual content
1. Flight

"Mae, it's all right. C'mon. Up."

I heard his voice above me, distant, obscure yet omnipresent.

I gripped the dirt beneath me and pushed up, pressing my sore feet to the earth, rising to meet his tired eyes.

"I'm coming..." I sighed to the static air. "I'm here."

He tugged me up by the arm, shoving his weight forward to get me to run with him. I stood and scampered along side.

We ran like scared wild beasts. I was dirty from falling and climbing, descending, climbing, hiding...

What would passerbys think when they saw a monk with no master and his servant girl fleeing from the temple masters? Surely they would believe we had done something to deserve exile, but why would we run like this? We didn't want to return; we couldn't. It was an inevitable impossibility to go back.

We had been running for hours, it seemed, although I'm not sure how long it really had been. Down this highroad, around the bends, onward to another road. And it was getting dark and they would have to relinquish the chase.

He was saying something to me, "-the water."

"What?"

"Jump in the water when we get there. I'll hold onto you."

"You know I don't need protection!"

He quickened his pace.

"Wait!"

He let me catch up. "Bastard," I teased.

We came to the second highroad, towards a farm. I saw the water in the distance glisten under the orange setting sun. He guided me towards it, the masters still on our heels.

He gripped my sweaty palm in his and took to the cliff-edge. I dared not think of jumping. But I couldn't stop. He had already begun to leap when I realized my feet were no longer touching earth.

We plummeted into the water, the liquid filling my eyes and ears. I felt stunned momentarily then my senses returned and I could only hear faint splashes. I realized I no longer held his hand. I surfaced, peeling away my hair and looked around.

A bullet shot into the water beside me. I turned, seeing the masters above with their aids shooting at me.

I dived, remembering catching a glimpse of ruins in the distance. Perhaps that's where he went.

I opened my eyes and though the clear water I could see his form swimming with a steady resolve towards the half sunken ruin.

I followed, only daring come for air when I felt on the verge of blacking out.

The bullets still shot past me into the water, and I could see them nearly strike him several times.

_ Why won't they just give up? What good would it do to kill us?_

I kept going even when I felt my arms would stiffen and fall and I would be shot.

Then I felt a pain in my arm. It went numb but I ignored it and kept trying to go. He didn't know what I was feeling. I kept going. I saw him surface behind the ruin. He spotted me and realized I needed help.

He swam back out, taking my arm, dragging me beneath him.

The blood was draining out of me and I began to feel dizzy. But I wouldn't let the pain take me.

I touched the ruin and held to its side. He ripped a piece of cloth from my skirt and tied my arm, pulling me behind the ruin where they couldn't see us.

We waited. We waited for the waters to settle and the sky to cloud over and for the rain to fall in pellets that hurt my face. The blood from my arm had dried the color of his overcoat.

"We have to get that thing out of you," he muttered.


	2. Darkness

**A few months prior**

When I was 10, Sin killed my family. A wandering monk found me and brought me to the temple in Bevelle. There, I became a servant to a boy named Auron, who at that time was 15. He never spoke to me; I only brought him his food and washed his wounds after a campaign or training. Five years later, as I set his platter on a table in his quarters and was about to leave, I heard him say my name for the first time.

"Mae," he whispered.

I turned in the darkness for I had just extinguished his candles save one. The light flickered in shadows in the wide room, across the tatamis and mats and towards his cot on the floor. He sat upright, looking at me in the dim light.

"Master," I bowed.

"Mae," he sighed again. "Thank you."

"I'm only doing my job-"

"Not for the food. But for you."

"Thank me for me?"

He laughed. "Thank you for never bothering me. The other girls-" (the other servants) "-I hear that they complain about their masters. They wish to be switched out. I hope you do not think that of me? That I am poor to you?"

I bowed again. "Never!" Straightening back up, "You have never even spoken to me! I simply thought you did not like me... But I never had a reason to think poorly of you."

"Hmm.. Good. Well, good night, Mae."

Bowing again, I left his quarters and made my way to the servant's rooms...

Four years after the first time he spoke to me, I came to see him as my friend. Friend is the only way to really describe our relationship, besides master/servant. I may have been unprofessional in believing this, it was surely not allowed for a training monk to become anything more than a master to his servant. But I liked to see him in a different light than his stoic unemotional self, constantly meditating or sitting on his cot as I watched him from across the room.

As the days passed, he would more and more consistently ask me to join him. He wanted my company. Of course I was stunned at first, but then he admitted that he felt a calm when I was around.

Well, he had practically grown up together. I was almost 20; soon it would be 10 years since I had arrived at this temple.

One night after training, I entered his rooms with his dinner tray. It was pitch black. _Why are the candles out?_ I fumbled for the table, placing the food down, and reaching around in my pockets for matches.

"Bloody hell," I muttered to the dark. "Damn..." I didn't have any. "Sir Auron?"

No response. He should be back. If he is he should have the candles lit.

I sighed, deciding to fumble around in his rooms for find some way to get light.

My foot hit bottles on the floor. _Sake_. "Auron..." Suddenly I felt arms about my legs, causing me to loose my balance and trip over onto the floor. I fell atop Auron, half asleep and drunk in his cot. He let go as I tried to scramble back up in the dark but he gripped my skirt as I tried to pull away.

"Let go, Auron. Come on." I bent down to unhand him but he reached up and pulled me back down by my waist. I fell back over his chest; he scrambled to get atop me. Best thing to do was not to fight because that only made a drunk more riled up.

I could feel that he was only in his pants; he normally slept like that actually...

"Auron. Whatever it was that made you- What're you-!"

His hands cupped my breasts and I tried to push him off, unsuccessfully of course.

_ Shit... was he going to try and rape me? He doesn't know what he's doing..._

I couldn't make a lot of noise, either. The walls were thin, and any sort of fight or upset would easily be heard. So should I just let him have go and forgive him later? Yevon only knows that I had lusted after Auron for years. But I was not this desperate...

I wrapped my arms around him as he sloppily kissed my neck, making my way to his hair. I pulled back on him, trying to make it hurt so he'd realize what he was doing.

What had happened that forced him to go into such a stupor like this? I had never seen him drunk like this before, never. Never alone anyway.

I pulled back on his hair harder but he only pressed himself more firmly against me. We were sprawled uncomfortably across his cot, sheets tossed around. I tried not to make any noise, but he had me pinned with his waist and hands still on my chest.

"Auron."

He took that as a cue to get his pants off. I tried to pull out from under him as he threw his pants aside, but he pressed me back down, ripping open my servant's gown.

I needed to get one of those bottles...

I felt him against my thigh, hands kneading my breasts. I reached back with both hands, stretching. He traced my arms with his hands. I felt glass on my fingertips. I struggled to get a grip on it but his hands came up to my own and pulled them back down.

There was nothing I could do.

I felt his erection between my legs and tried to stifle back the tears that were welling up. I wouldn't cry. I'm stronger than that.

He let go of one of my hands to grip my side. I reached back up, feeling the bottle again. I scooted back an inch and felt him rub against me. I touched the glass again, straining, gasping, taking hold of the neck.

Then I shattered it against his head. _Forgive me_... I knew that the pain I would have felt in a few moments surpassed that which I just inflicted upon him. I felt blood drip on my face and he collapsed against me.

_ Shit_. It was just the top of his head, I didn't get his face. At least I hope I didn't...

I pushed him aside and scrambled up, feeling for the wall behind the cot. I made my way to a table, fumbling to find drawers. Eventually I found matches and incense sticks. _At least it would light up a bit..._

I lit them, releasing an aroma and a small flicker of light. I felt along the wall, going around away from the glass, and came back to the door where I had set his food. There was a larger candle there which I lit. I looked over at Auron naked on his sheets, unconscious.

I cleaned the blood, threw away the bottles and the glass, and managed to sew up my robe. He was still out, but I dared not move him. I felt scared to move him. I should, but I simply couldn't. I sat against the wall next to him, head buried in my knees, and waited.

I awoke to hear his grumbling against the sheets. It was day and the masters had come by once to ask why he wasn't yet up. I could only answer that something was bothering him and he would not come out.

He pushed himself up and I looked away as I heard him kneel. Moments passed and he did nothing. Finally, he said my name.

"Mae... what- oh my..._dammit_. Did I- did I do anything to you? Did I hurt you?"

"Almost."

He sighed and beat his fists on the floor. I stood and leaned against the wall beside him, still looking away.

"Mae... I'm so sorry. I'm...I can't believe that I almost-"

"Get dressed, Auron. You've got a bad wound. I'll need to clean it."

I knelt before him, getting out any small glass pieces that may have stuck, washing away the dry blood. We sat in silence until he decided to tell me what happened.

"Mae, the temple wants me to marry. I refuse."

"Why?" I asked as calmly as possible.

"I don't believe in marriage for political reasons-"

"Auron, when you got into this temple, you knew what they did."

"But I didn't choose to enter."

"But you stayed." I wiped the last bits of blood and folded my hands in my lap. "If you refuse, they will excommunicate you."

"I realize that."

"You know it would affect me as well. The servant always goes with the master."

"I know."

"Auron, this is the only place I know. I cannot leave."

"You can."

"How?"

He humphed and motioned to get up. I placed my fingers on lightly on his arm and he peered down at me and shook his head.

"Why can't you leave, Auron?"

"It's none of your concern."

"Of course it is! Tell me!"

He stood and I followed, crossing my arms to indicate that I _was_ going to get an answer.

"Because I am in love with you," he finally sighed.

"Then why did you try to rape me?"

"You know I was drunk."

"Why were you drunk?"

He sighed. "I felt-"

"That it would help?"

He looked at me sorrowfully, apologetic, miserable. I had never seen him like this before. "Is it because you don't believe in marriage, or that you cannot marry someone you do not love? Or that it is because you say you love me?"

"Auron, I will not accept you until you have a better reason to leave this temple." I sighed, "I'm not-angry-at you for what you did. But I find it ridiculous that you would get so drunk over such a trivial thing."

"It's not trivial, Mae!" His gaze pierced me in anger- at himself? "I will not marry! And if they wish for me to leave, then so be it."

"Excuse me," came a voice from the doorway. One of the masters. "We wish to speak with you." Auron.

I bowed to the master and watched as Auron gave me one last look, sorry for what he almost did, and left.


	3. Forest

He returned several hours later that evening. I had finished cleaning the mats and disposing the shards. Then I simply waited across the room until he came in. He did not glance at me as he took off his overcoat and dropped it on the floor. He did not say a word to me as he sat on his cot and beckoned for me to stand before him.

"Forgive me again, Mae. I realize that my actions were unnecessary and led to horrible consequences. But I hope that you can understand my reasons for not wishing to marry."

"Auron... there is not much to understand. You...believe that you love me but I honestly find it ridiculous."

"Why?"

"Because... why would you?"

I sat before him on the floor as he leaned back against the wall. "You've been a good friend to me, Mae. And I am sorry it took me so long to warm up to you. I thought that I was in control of my emotions. But I proved myself wrong. You've always supported me and you've always helped me-"

"Because it was my duty, Auron. You should not look into it further."

His eyes hardened. "You do not accept me then?"

"No." I felt my vision fade for the moment and my heart quickened as I lied to him. "I cannot accept your feelings for me because I will not take part in your desire to leave the temple." I stood up, looking down at him. "If I were not part of this equation then perhaps I might give you a chance, Auron. But I cannot leave this place. It is all I know. And I will stay here even if I must find another master."

He sighed, gazing up at the ceiling, closing his eyes. I bowed and excused myself. Then I stopped at the doorway, turning back momentarily. "What did they want of you?"

His voice was much lower: "They threatened excommunication. I have two months to decide."

We did not speak for the next few weeks. Our relationship shifted back to the days when I first arrived and he wanted nothing to do with me. I found my gaze lingering a few moments too long when I served him and he would shift away awkwardly. But I had to remain with him to serve and cleanse him after training. He never said a word and never refused my services.

But yet one day he stopped me as I took to leave to prepare a meal. "Mae." I stopped in the doorway and turned back, approaching him on his cot.

"Sir Auron?" I didn't usually call him 'Sir' and he glanced away momentarily before looking back at me.

"I am still leaving."

"Then so be it."

"Mae! Will you fight to stay here then?"

"No." I shook my head. I had been thinking earlier that day that I might as well leave because things would simply not feel right to me unless I served him. And if he decided to leave, then I would go with temple polices and leave with him. "I will join you should you leave. But only!" I raised a finger at him, "because you are my master and you are the only master I shall ever serve. Do you understand me, Auron?"

This sudden shift to informalities surprised him a bit. He nodded, "Yes, of course."

"Very well then. We must plan on our escape."

"I'm getting kicked out."

"Well, yes, we can get kicked out if you want to be shamed."

"I will go as the temple prescribes, Mae. Now do _you_ understand _me_?"

"Yes. Fine… Now, do you still want your meal?"

"I am famished…"

The day came when Auron informed the temple masters that he would still not marry the priest's daughter. They were sorely disappointed but did not excommunicate him. Instead, he was barred from communications with the upper tier in the temple and quickly fell out of favor. I stayed with him for the next few weeks as his relationships degenerated. His friend Kinoc became the girl's fiance. I didn't like that man much, but I said nothing. Auron was still bound to serve the temples and if he ever wished to leave, he would have to do so through procedures. But the days were drawing on him. The respect he once received and thrived on was gone and he made constant comments on his poor decision. One night his complaints became so severe that I slapped him hard across the cheek. He stared at me, wide-eyed, then apologized for his indiscretions.

"Auron, it will never be too late to ask for forgiveness from the temple and redeem our standing. But if you are not going to do that, then stop this!"

"Of course, Mae. I know. Forgive me. I am only frustrated."

"Then let's leave!"

"It's not that easy."

"Make it easy then."

"Do you know what that implies?"

"Yes. They'll come after us. But you know how we could make it worse for them? Taking something precious. As a lesson never to let a good monk go."

He smirked. "Never thought you were one for stealing."

"If it benefits us and hurts them a bit, why not? They ruined you, unnecessarily."

"Mae-"

"Forgive me. Just an idea."

But the following morning, I managed to snatch a sphere. And then that's when our life together really started.

Someone had seen me unfortunately, and through all of Auron's cursings, I managed to tug him through the streets, out of the city, and we ran.

We ran into the woods of Macalania, taking side paths through the trees until we lost our pursuers. We panted against the soft bark of a thin trunk, silencing our breaths when we thought we heard someone returning to find us. Luckily, it was only a small fiend passing through, ignoring us.

"Mae."

I slid around the tree until I bumped his shoulder with my own and looked at him from the corner of my vision.

"What?"

"You were foolish." But his voice held amusement and therefore I knew he would not scold me further. "What is it a sphere of?"

"I don't really know," I said, pulling the small orb from my inside pocket. It glistened a light blue as I held it tightly, showing it to him. "Something from Spira's past probably."

We had to way of watching it since we did not have a viewer. Auron shrugged and grunted, tucking it within his own robe.

"Hopefully it will be something important to someone eventually."

I hmm'd a response and asked, "What now?"

"We rest here. Then get going."

"Where?"

"As far as possible. Besaid would be a good choice. Or Kilika."

I nodded, "Wise."

Pushing off from the truck, I stepped through some brambles a few paces before he said my name. I turned, cocking my head slightly.

He was weary. "Forgive me."

"For what?"

"Making you follow me."

"Don't be silly. I came with you willingly, remember?"

He nodded and followed me further into the forest until we came to the center lake with the large shining tree growing from its depths. It really was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. Romantic, really…

A tight awkwardness fashioned itself in my chest as I heard Auron stop a few paces behind me, looking. At what? I peered over my shoulder to observe him with his eyes closed. Then he sat cross-legged on the ground and breathed deeply. I let him be and stood watching the trees glisten in the faint light.


	4. Luca

Auron had fallen asleep where he sat by the time I returned from wandering around close by. I could not stray too far from Auron because I never learned any magics besides healing and protection spells. My weak black magic was no match against he caliber of fiends that prowled Macalania Woods at this time of day. But I was sure that I would be helpful in our journey to come. Fiends ran rampant throughout Spira and increased daily as more and more people died by the thrashes of Sin and summoners were not around to perform proper sendings. More people were also victims of unclean deaths as they became frustrated and angry with their way of life. _Would Sin ever stop?_ After your entire family is killed by a creature too powerful for words to fathom, one's simple choice in life is to end it and become a mindless, soulless fiend. The dead's only hope at that point was to be killed again by the hands of a warrior.

Auron was powerful, he was the _most _powerful, and despite his refusal to concede with the temple's wishes, he would always gain respect as the greatest warrior monk in all of Spira. I was pleased to be at his side, honored to travel these roads with him, however dangerous they might become, and secretly very _very_ happy that I was the recipient of his love.

He noticed that I was standing behind him and looked over his shoulder. "Mae? What are you doing there?"

"Watching you. One of us should always be awake when the other sleeps. You nodded off."

He grunted and stood, shouldering his blade and took a step towards me at the edge of the clearing.

"We should go. They might still catch up with us."

I agreed and we departed for the Thunder Plans.

The following two days where nothing but travel. Crossing the Thunder Plains was a chore by itself as we had to consistently watch for lightning-strikes which were bound to strike open areas despite the ancient lightning rods erected sporadically through the center of the plains. Coming to Guadosalam, we rested only a few hours before proceeding across the Moonflow, and along Mushroom Rock Road where the temple priests has suddenly caught up with us. We dared not try to stand and fight. We were greatly outnumbered and killing a member of the temples was a crime that even we dared not commit. I know that they wanted the sphere we had stolen, they even might have been trying to capture me for engineering our escape and running away as well. Nearing the local Al-Bhed inn, Auron suggested we jump into the deep waters below. Bullets marked our bootprints, catching our loose clothing and sent up clouds of dust along our path. We dived and hid behind a ruin in the water and waited for the temple to give up and for the rain to pound down around us. We were tired and I could barely stay afloat with a bullet in my arm. Auron wrapped a tight arm around my waist and pulled me against him tightly as he held firm to the ruin behind us. His warm breath stained my neck, ponytail ticking my arms, and I gripped the back of his robe around his blade with as much force as I could spare. I could still feel the sphere against my hip in a pocket but with the weight of that and Auron's sword on his back, we could not stay like this for much longer. Bobbing up and down, I finally begged that Auron loosen me so I could try and heal myself. I was weak from lack of recuperative sleep and managed to only pull out the bullet, clot the bleeding, and close the wound; I was not strong enough to heal myself completely. We needed rest, food, clean water. These could all be found in Luca.

Tonight, when we managed to swim far enough to shore and slowly climb back up to the Mi'ihen Highroad, we slept under the stars. Auron kept watch for the night as I felt my magics slowly restore in my body.

Auron told me once that he was not fond of magic as he was of brute strength. He was a warrior, not a healer like me, so this bias came as no surprise. But when he hinted that I was useless, I countered this statement by slashing his hand open with a knife. As he cursed and the blood flowed onto my garment, I took his hand firmly between my own and ordered him to tell me that again.

"_Useless_, Auron? How many times have you come back to Bevelle and I've healed you? You've let me heal you so how can you say that magics like mine are useless? Can you heal yourself with a blade? Even fire is a form of magic. You cannot cauterize wounds without the fire to heat the blade. But that is an unnecessary pain that I can eliminate with a few words and the grace of Yevon."

I said my spell and it was like he had never been harmed.

"You've made your point, Mae," he huffed. "We need you…. I need you here."

As I now lay at the gates of Luca with Auron watching the Road for nighttime fiends, I smiled. Auron looked down at me as the smile faded and he asked me why I was happy.

"We have no home," he said.

"You sound accusing, Auron. It's your own damn fault."

"I must find another purpose."

I laughed and stood up, stretching. It would be dawn soon. "Not yet. Let's enjoy the freedom while we have it."

"We shouldn't waste time."

"Well do you have a plan?" I stood with firm hands on hips and wide eyes. "Because we can't go back to any of the temples so it's probably best we stay in the city and find work until something better chances upon us."

Auron looked away without demonstrating an ounce of agreement and then started off towards the city that was just awakening for the day. With a sigh, I followed him, realizing that maybe we should have had a plan before leaving the temple. There was not much Auron could do besides becoming a freelancer or a guardian to a summoner. But who would dare put their pilgrimage on the line by hiring a man who defies Yevon's law?

I trailed behind Auron in silence and wondered why he had confessed his sudden love to me and yet never followed it up with any sort of action? We traveled as a master and a servant, even after leaving Bevelle. I tended his small scratches and picked plants that I knew would fill us up for a little while. He only ever nodded a thanks, as if he had forgotten everything that happened prior to now. We acted as if he had never been drunk, had never mindlessly attempted rape, never apologized or said the three words that would make any other woman fall over in a faint. Therefore, when we found lodging in an old couple's basement in the heart of Luca by the stadium, I bared the door with arms out to either side and would not allow Auron to leave.

"What are you doing, Mae? Don't be foolish, let me pass."

"Not until you tell me why you said you loved me."

"Why are you asking this? Let me pass!"

"Then tell me why because nothing's changed and therefore your words hold no meaning for me."

He was visibly shocked. "What? Haven't I protected you? It was my excuse to leave the temple."

"Excuse or reason?"

"Mae…."

I lowered my arms slowly and felt ashamed. I looked down at the floor, observing faint shadows flow across the old wooden floorboards from the light that leaked through up above us. "You would not marry that woman despite the great benefits your position could have given both of us. You say you did not marry because you did not love her, because you claim you love me."

"It is the truth."

"How can I know this to be true unless I feel it in my own heart?" I stepped forward and clutched the edge of Auron's robe in a tight fist with a palm splayed firmly on his chestpiece.

"I will stay by your side as your servant and as your friend. Never as your lover because instability is not something you can afford. There would be too much pain to bear should something awful happen."

"Why do you think like this? We've just come here to start a new life but you already tell me about your fears."

"It's foolish," I said, releasing him but I did not step back. "I beg your pardon."

I studied his face and features drawn from observing too much death and sorrow in Spira's people. I reached out with both hands, applying my palms lightly on his cheeks, parting his lips with a light stroke of my thumb. Hesitant, I kissed him lightly. His own hands rose to peel mine away, closing his eyes as he leaned in for another kiss, deeper than the first, open and welcoming and seeking forgiveness.

He broke away, muttering something about finding breakfast. A faint blush stained his cheeks before he brushed past me, declaring that he would return shortly.

I was tired but my heart was beating too harshly to allow me to take a brief nap. Instead, I sat at the edge of the only cot in the room, watching bugs scuttle from corner to corner of the room, and practiced the little black magic that I knew in hopes that one day, I could be a black mage, a class that I always found slightly more respectable than a healer. I would not forget my white magics, however; they were necessary for Auron's well-being.

I wanted to be more than a servant and despite what I just told him about never wanting to be his lover, I desired more than ever to lay at his side with his lips to mine.

I feared what was to happen next, where we would go, what we would do and most importantly, who we might meet.

For our time in Luca, I could only sit and wait and work menial jobs as Auron trained on the Road, knowing all too well what the man in blue wanted of this fallen monk.


	5. To Bevelle

Auron went out one morning as he usually did to train but did not return for lunch. A young boy found me at home later in the evening, telling me I had to go to the docks.

"Now. He said to pack your things. You have to go. Now, miss, he said!"

"Who said? Who sent you?" I asked, bending down to the boy's eye-level.

"The man in red. He said to get you."

I thanked the boy and sent him back off, wondering as to why Auron couldn't come get me himself. By the time I had packed the few belongings I had collected while in Luca and made it to the docks, all the ships were tossing their ropes and I heard Auron call my name from one of them.

I ran to one of the smaller ships and was able to board just in time, finding Auron on the top deck leaning over the heavy wooden railing. There was a brisk wind to push the sails, tossing my hair about my face and strands of Auron's from his brow.

I dropped my things at my feet and gripped the railing with one hand, my other light against Auron's arm.

"Where are we going, Auron? Why the urgency?"

He did not look at me, only the faintest smile crossed his lips which he quickly suppressed in hopes that I did not see it. I would pretend that I did not and instead sighed and turned, crossing my arms and leaned on the railing beside him.

"We were doing so well. But whatever this is, I'm sure I'll find out eventually," I sighed.

"When we arrive in Bevelle."

"Bevelle?" I took his arm again. "Auron, what is going on? We can't go back there! The priests tried to kill us because we ran!"

"Because you took the sphere," he said, bitterness lining his words.

"It was a foolishness, something you should know greatly of."

"You didn't have to follow me, Mae."

"Beg your pardon, but I do believe that you wanted me to come. I was the one who was adamant about us _both_ staying in the first place. I came with you because I had to, because you are still my master, and I think you would have found a way to take me with you even if I had locked myself in the Via Purifico."

Auron shifted his weight and stretched his arms out over the railing, hidden scars revealed as his sleeves fluttered in the sea breeze.

"I do love you Mae, and I hope that you will understand everything when we reach the city. For now, let's go below deck."

He pushed away and began to descend; I followed a few moments later.

Shutting the door behind us and lighting only one candle in the small cabin which we would share on this short journey, Auron rested his sword against the wall and proceeded to strip himself of his arm guard, belt, and robe. I pulled off my boots and settled at the edge of the bed, tugging my legs up beside me, hands clasped tightly in my lap. I had a vague idea as to why we were returning to Bevelle but I may have been wrong and did not want to think too much of it tonight. I did not want to be angry with Auron again for making a decision with which I did not agree. I neglected my duties as servant tonight and did not help him strip, did not fold up the robe as I always did into a neat square and set it beside the bed. I did not dampen a towel and moisten his face and neck as was ritual before or offer to rub his shoulders and arms to release the tension from a long day of training. The only similarity between tonight and before was that we did not speak.

Auron sat beside me cross-legged and took a hand from my lap, caressing it between his slightly larger, rougher ones. I could only look down at our contrasting skin, desiring to say so much in an effort to understand but these thoughts were suppressed with a light kiss to my cheek and a soft whisper of "I'm sorry, Mae."

He might have been apologizing for that say that now seemed so long ago when he was drunk and tried to hurt me. Maybe he was sorry for snapping at me just then on the deck, trying to find a reason to be upset. But perhaps he was sorry for falling in love with me, knowing that something was going to occur which might hurt me. But I had told him that I would follow if that was his choice and I stayed loyal. I would continue to stay loyal, no matter his decision or its consequences.

He did not pull away, his grip tightening on my hand and I satisfied him by turning my head for a proper kiss, my other hand free to trail his neck and fingertips grazing his jaw line.

"Mae," he whispered. "Will you stay at my side?"

"Who are you asking? Your servant or the woman you love? Because either will do so."

"You have changed your mind then?"

"Perhaps. I believe you love me. And I have also come to acknowledge that I am willing to be more than your servant. So who are you asking?"

"I am asking my servant for her loyalty and the woman I love for her love in return."

I kissed him again and smiled weakly, pulling my hand out from under his so that I could clasp his face lightly beneath my palms. I nodded slowly, saying, "You have both."

I released him completely and Auron watched as I shifted myself to lie down with a hand splayed across my stomach and another out in offering.

"Mae, is this wise?"

"Here I thought that _you_ were the one who wanted _me_. Is this a lie?"

I was half-teasing him, and perhaps I shouldn't. I still felt a slight tension that had built ever since we left Bevelle. I had rejected his love and his reasons to leave the temples. I still thought it was a stupid decision but I vowed to be at his side nevertheless which was only leading us back to where we had started. In defiance of the temples we had run away to find freedom and a new life but my fears had never disappeared, deep as they were in my heart.

He crawled and knelt over me, his ponytail swinging down over his shoulder, half-lidded eyes wavering as he kissed me deeply and I crossed my hands behind his neck. The growing intensity of the kiss was accompanied by exaggerated breaths and rising heartbeats. Fingers trailed along flesh and our rising breaths were accompanied by the soft creak of leather and rustle of discarded clothing to the smooth floor of the small cabin where every sound we made was amplified.

My thin underwear and his pants were all that remained and I felt him growing against me. My hands wandered down his sides to his hips as he kissed my neck, a rough palm caressing my breast and I ground up my pelvis in urgency, whispering his name into his ear. Trailing my fingers from his hip, I pushed two down inside his waistband just deep enough to brush the tip of his erection and the precum that was swelling before I attempted to tug at his pants.

He did this for me, adding another article to our pile, and kissed me again, his lips and hands exploring every curve on a slow decent until he asked me for permission with gentle eyes to remove my last piece of clothing. I could feel myself blushing furiously with swelled breasts and a slickness between my legs as he came back up for another kiss, more gentle than those that had taken us to this point. With one hand at his waist, I wrapped the other firmly around his stiff organ, stroking once, twice, taking a bead of his fluid to my lips and urged him with a soft "Please."

I wrapped up my legs around his waist, guiding him into me, and clawed at his back with his initial thrust. I pushed back each time, my head craning to the side, eyes wide open to the flickering darkness and the light that snuck from under the doorway. I hoped no one passed by, and if they did, I imagined them listening intently.

He sucked at the soft skin of my neck enough to bruise and I couldn't help but gasp in time with his suppressed grunts. When I caught his gaze again, his eyes were bright and full of promises and I trapped his mouth with a deep moan. I was trembling as he kept trusting and I held tightly to his waist, my breasts pressed firmly to his chest and legs tightening against him as I came, gasping his name in release. He climaxed moments later before pulling out but did not immediately stand up. I perched up on my shoulders for a light kiss, my heart rate slowly returning to normal.

He stood and I followed. There was suddenly a loud blaring noise that announced the ship would soon be at port. Auron looked at me with widened eyes as if wary that I would still turn away. I smiled and we dressed in silence, waiting until it was time to depart.

I squeezed Auron's hand before we stepped off the ship in descending darkness. He did not look at me but rebalanced the long blade on his shoulder and descended first.

Not ten feet from the dock that we were stopped by a stranger calling Auron's name from behind.

Turning to see a man in elaborate summoner's garb approach us, we bowed. The man did as well in reply. "My name is Braska. Thank you for visiting Bevelle."


End file.
